20090602

dark rituals

I know I could summon the devil at any time. He's appeared before, offered to give me power, wealth, whatever I ask for--all I have to do is sign my soul away, and it's mine. I've never really wanted any of that, though. I don't need money, and I'm not a domineering person. I just want to live my life, and I think he respects that in his own way. But I know how to bring him back, if I wanted.

It's been tough lately. My girlfriend left me, and I've alienated most of my friends while I was trying to deal with it. My family's not talking to me, even. I lost my job. I've just been sitting at home, trying to read some of the books I have sitting around, but I just can't focus on the pages. It's lonely. And I know the devil's so close. I could call him up if I wanted. He told me this would happen, even. Just a word and he's here. But he doesn't understand, I don't want revenge, I don't want him to force anyone to come back. Honestly, right now I just want a hug.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Sending a cyber-hug. Kathy

Accentuated Frequency said...

Hug to you too- Similar situations as I noted in one of my entries very recently... they say bad luck or crappy things, happen in 3's but sometimes they come in 4's,5's or 10's...but what I have found from having the most unlucky and crappiest year of my life so far, is that you need to learn from what you can, and make sure that your living your life as honest and happy as possible and once you can reach your inner happiness once again, without using anything but your own self and the source of happiness, the world can be a bit brighter. Again, i've thought about this a lot recently and it is what I tell myself.