apologetic letters

To L_____, who suspects.

I hope you'll forgive me in advance for the next several months. Maybe you already have. You alone know everything there is to know about me. It makes me uneasy. It's why I've been acting the way I have and why I have to do this. Know that you are always in my thoughts. I'm just not ready for someone who understands me--if you really understand me that means you're judging me, not some persona or game I'm playing. I can't hide from you, so I'm running, but I will ever be
Respectfully yours,
R____ M_____

To M_____, who has been away for some time.
You know how inexpressibly sorry I am I haven't been in touch. It's my fault. My priorities were not right--maybe still aren't--but they've changed now. You, at least, are in your rightful place, at the top and center of my thoughts and plans. I'm sorry I can't give you perfection. You'll have to settle for the same man you've known all these years. But I think you already knew that. The weather is beautiful. Wish you were here.
All my love,
R_____ M_____


Rhi said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Rhi said...

It's interesting to try to guess in these where the narrator ends and you begin.
I suspect this is one of the instances where the line is so thin, so blurred.
So I will offer you this, and you can take from it what you will, but I think to truly understand some one is when you've stopped judging them. The process of judging some one is because you don't understand, so you project your own ideals onto the person so you can somehow comprehend to your satisfaction.
But to understand some one? All that is no longer necessary- you accept it for what it is because you know.

To see all the sides of a person is to know them.
To see all the sides and accept the person as the sum of the parts is to love them.

Though if I am overstepping my bounds, you don't have to listen to a damn word, and it was all a dream.