Falling in love means forgetting to watch, forgetting about context.

I'm a simple man. I spend my days at work, and my evenings taking care of my sister. I'm all she's got, and have been for a few years now. She's sixteen and doesn't talk much anymore. I try to be there because there's no one to take care of me.

She never used to be the quiet one. That was me. I'd watch, wait, try to understand before I do anything. It kept me safe. It meant I made the right decisions mostly, though sometimes I felt like maybe it meant I didn't make any decisions at all, and that was never fun. The point is when she started being quiet I started worrying. Maybe I was doing it all wrong.

Then there was this amazing girl--or woman, I guess--and she was so nice and helpful and understanding and I just forgot to watch. I didn't understand how any one person could be so amazing and helpful and perfect. I didn't wonder if maybe she was just one of those people, someone who is like that without any regard for who you are--someone who is just genuinely a good person, in fact.

But I'm just a simple man and sometimes I forget that I got where I am by watching. I think maybe I drove her away.

No comments: