ancient

There's an argument I have with the princess all the time, where I ask her why she has any right to rule and why any of us should be following her, and I pick holes in her responses until she gets tired of me and kicks me out. It always comes down to this: her family has been there the longest, so the throne is hers by right--you know how it goes. Tonight something I said must have stuck with her because she's sitting outside my tent when I get back from wandering the woods.

She's tired of trying to find an answer I like, and wants me to give her one. So I tell her to follow me and lead her off into the woods. There's an old ruined shrine here--the kind that's been ruined since before any of this started, so overgrown and decayed that you could miss it if you don't know how to look. "Why do I like places like this?"

"Because you like anything that reminds us that we exist at the sufferance of nature?"

"Well, yes, but that's not the answer I'm looking for." I sit down against a crumbling wall. "This place is ancient, and there's still some power here, but not enough that anyone's likely to care about it. There will be no wars over a place like this. So why did I lead you out here?"

"Because you delight in being cryptic and irritating?"

"Also true, but still not the point." I lie down and close my eyes. "I like these places because they're beautiful, and peaceful. I feel safe here."

"So . . . you think you should be following me because I'm pretty?"

"You're trying to bait me. I won't bite. But you're not far off. There's plenty of ancient things in this world with no merits to speak of, to say nothing of the ones that are actively harmful. If there is a reason for us to follow you, it has nothing to do with tradition. Be worthy of it, and you'll convince me."

She sits in silence for a long while, and eventually lies down next to me. "How do I convince myself I'm worthy?" she asks, quietly. Like she's afraid that if she speaks too loudly, the world might realize she's human, with human vulnerabilities. It breaks my heart, just a little.

I don't have an answer to that question, and maybe she just thought I was asleep. I keep my eyes closed and my breathing steady, until my feigned sleep becomes real and the night becomes morning.